Sunday, 9 December 2012

Flying on a commercial plane vs being a private pilot (student!)


Commercial
Private
You have to get there at least two hours before
If you get there two hours before – someone else still has your plane
Your photo ID is scrutinized at least 3 times by at least two different agencies
Dispatch recognize your face as you walk in
You need to fill in vast amounts of personal history online before you can even get a boarding card
Dispatch get you to sign the book and then throw you the keys
You spend hours lining up in various security queues
You may need to hang around 5 minutes while they top up your fuel tanks
You spend ages sitting in the lounge because the flight crew hasn’t arrived from their previous flight yet
You spend some time sitting in the lounge because your instructor has missed the ferry (again!)
Anyone attempting to go airside needs a special pass that was issued by a government agency and involved extensive background checks
To get airside you need to memorize a three digit code
All hand baggage is subject to extensive security screening and unaccompanied baggage will be destroyed
Hand baggage may be left unattended as long as no one trips over it.
All food and drink will be instantly confiscated at security
Dispatchers and instructors encourage you to bring TimBits in
If you aren’t in the frequent flyer club then you have no chance of getting a decent seat at check in
You can pretty much guarantee which seat you’re gonna get!
The legroom is sucky
The seat doesn’t go far forward enough for your feet to reach the peddles
You have to deal with screaming children and other irritating passengers
You have to deal with sadistic instructors "failing " the engine on you
 You look on with mild bordeom as you see the safety briefing yet again
 you are reponsible for giving the safety briefing
 

 Anyone think of anything that I've missed?
 

2 comments:

  1. Since I can't do any fancy formatting I shall give you the code I'm going to use: Commercial = C, Private = P

    C: You sit in the back wishing you could hear what ATC is saying to the pilots
    P: You sit at the holding point wishing ATC would remember you exist.

    C: You sit in your seat contemplating the inflight meal and hoping there won't be turbulence at the cruise altitude.
    P: You sit in turbulence contemplating your breakfast and hoping you won't see it again at any altitude

    C: You agonize over whether you have left the gas on at home or not.
    P: You agonize over whether you have enough gas to get home or not.

    My favourite:

    C: You spot something interesting and wish the pilots would turn the plane so you can take another look.
    P: You turn the aircraft towards the point of interest and plan an orbit while you get your camera out.

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  2. All of these are 100% accurate , I love it !
    Been there, done that on all of them I think!

    the second one is so true, on the bit of my spin video that I edited out, you can hear the following conversation

    Bob : can you see that cloud over there?
    WMAP : I think I'm about to see my breakfast!

    Thanks !

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